Saturday, October 25, 2008

And So It Begins...

And so it begins.

For the first time in history a Black man has a serious shot at the White House. For the first time a Black family may seriously be the face of the American family. For the first time someone who looks somewhat like me, may be leading my country. But with so much newness, comes a blast from the past. A white woman accusing a Black man of a vicious, violent attack against her.

And so it begins.

So apparently this woman - Ashley Todd, a 20 year old college student from Texas and a McCain campaign worker - was mugged by a big, ol' Black man at an ATM. This big black man not only wanted cash, but wanted her vote, too. After beating her up and taking her money, this big-black-man wouldn't leave well enough alone and decided to carve a backwards letter B into her face after seeing a McCain sticker on her car. Apparently this BigBlackMan is illiterate or dyslexic or both. Or maybe he's just a BIGBLACKMAN. I think it's the latter. Of course, the woman later decanted, admitting that she fabricated (read pulled that crazy shit out of her ass) the story.

This is upsetting on so many levels. So many. First of all, not only is this story just down right bizarre, but it stinks of sexualized racism. It reminds me of just how close we are to those days when a story like this would've meant a Black body hanging from a tree right now. A white woman accusing a Negro man of attacking her, because of a Mulatto man who's getting too big for his britches? Sounds like something out of an Imitation of Life-esque movie circa 1942. And yet it's 2008.

And so it begins.

With this election, Black folks have gotten a much needed self-esteem boost. It's like these last 6 months have given us a collective shot of pride chased down with some good ol' self love. People who never even thought about registering to vote are getting registered. Folks who never gave a damn about politics are turning off BET and TBN (or better yet, the Word Network) and tuning in to ABC, CBS, and CNN. Little kids are talking about Barack Obama in a way that children from previous generations could only pretend or dream up. It's amazing. But, before we let our chests pop with pride and dignity, I caution my sisters and my brothers to remember when and where we are.

This is America. The same country that just three years ago let our people lie in their own wastes, be corraled like animals into sports facilities and waited days before even expressing an inkling of care when Hurricane Katrina hit the gulf coast. This is the country that heards millions of little Black children into reeducation prisons, er, schools that leave them with a debillitating self-hatred and a crippling illiteracy that prevents them from ever achieving the illusion of the American dream. This is the country where just last month a Black man was dragged beneath a car driven by white men. The country where that story is sadly not the first case of such an act of barbarism. The country where white citezens and police officers alike can take a Black life without any risk of or penalty to their own. This is America circa 2008.

This story should be an example, a reminder if you will. That despite the fact that Barack Obama, a Black man, is a fingersnap away from winning the presidency, this is still the United States of America and we are still Black. We need to know that when Barack Obama wins, there are white folks who are ready to tear this country apart. And then there are white folks who are willing to pretend that it's not happening, or better yet that it has nothing to do with race. Or even better yet, use Obama as a token and blame all other Black folks not on his level.

And so it begins.

Some white folks will never be able to live it down if a Black man becomes president of the United States. Some white folks are willing to sacrifice their own bodies for this. I mean, this woman carved a letter B into her own face. How insane is that? I mean really. And I truly believe this is just the beginning of what we will see in the coming weeks, months, years. Some of us (self included) thought we would never see the day when a Black person became president. Now we need to think about what we will see after he becomes president. And we need to be prepared.

Go Barack! (insert raised fist)

Friday, October 24, 2008

The Rebirth

So this is me. I'm starting a new blog for a new point in my life. I sit here with all twenty-four-years-ten-months-one-week-and-five-days of life, experience, existence, being, etc... and with my thoughts. This is what I have to offer. This is what I want to offer. This is the first step on my journey to me. Well, maybe not the first step, but a step nonetheless.

I am a writer with what, of late, seems to be an aversion to writing.

I am putting an end to that today.

So what am I? Who am I? I am, like Jill Scott's album, beautifully human. I am a work in progress. I am a lover of women, of love, of self. I am a feminist... a Black feminist. I am intelligent. I am a thinker. I am falling... I am a mother. A good one. I am one. I am communal. I am ready...

So this is the beginning. I'm looking at 25 and I am choosing to live. And for me, choosing to write is choosing life. Write to life... (I am pro-choice :) just had to clear that up...) I am seizing the day! Living the 4th!

I am grateful. Grateful to so many who came before, during, or will come after my existence, but who have added to it, nurtured it, gave me room to grow, grow, grow. I am growing, going, spreading my wings. I am flying, no I am that little bird on the edge of the nest, waiting, wanting, wishing to fly... I have flown, but I guess I want to soar... Tweedly deeeeeeee...

I am silly. I laugh. Often. I smile too... and yes, sometimes it's to mask my tears. Sometimes it's to quell them.

I am passionate. I live for love. Love is my god. God is love. We all are capable of love. If we all did, damn... I exist in the throws of emotion, I crave it, I need it, it is my food. Yummy food. And I love to eat.

I think, no I am... finished. For now.